Tuesday, August 21, 2007

I Dream of Jennie

Mad Gab!

Putt Meow Tough Mime Missouri

A hint: Morning after a long night at the bars, or finishing on the bubble via bad beat after five hours in a MTT

You’re dreaming of this cute geekish chick (or guy if you’re into that sort of thing), the setting is a Venetian penthouse suite that you’ve procured after rolling for two straight hours on the $100 minimum bet craps tables. The champagne and chocolate dipped strawberries are waiting bedside. As you wait on the plush bed with enough pillows to build a replica of Fort Knox, she steps out of the bubbling Jacuzzi throwing away that librarian look for the cover girl of Hustler with every soap bubble popping from her slim, athletic body.

The slow dulcet tunes of a jazz trio fill the room with anticipation as she crouches on the foot of the bed with lust in her emerald green eyes. Crawling up towards you, purring like a cat that was just stroked in the right spots…

… then some no-neck 3rd rate nightclub bouncer complete with 90s styles phone cord earpiece barges into the room.

“You’ve already checked out sir, now step away from the bed as its time to leave”

And you wake up way too early to a Brad Paisley song emitting badly from a clock radio you won at the church carnival playing skee-ball with your oversized cat using your balls as swatting practice.

Can I go back to bed now?

Thanks for dropping by, now I took a little offense from “Common Man” Cole yesterday’s KFAN broadcast concerning Santana’s blowout performance with his 17Ks plus shutout.
Why downplay such a dominating string of pitching with “the Rangers probably partied all night at Shiek’s, Déjà vu, Dream Girls and were hungover at the time”. C’mon, I know the bitter pill is hard to swallow that Santana will probably be moving on to bigger bucks, but why not relish his presence now and applaud his diligence in performing at that level despite a team that put up a total of one run for support. Even if he’s performing for a bigger contract, he’s going out and doing the job he’s paid for and striving for extra credit. That’s more then the water noodle bats of the bench players on the Twins could say right now.

And… at least he didn’t drown or shoot Old Yeller. If there’s justice Vick will end up in general population in the pen.

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