You're The Best Arrrrrrrrrrround

*Start up The Karate Kid soundtrack

No NASCAR driver would ever think about putting themselves at the helm as much as the First Mormon Son of Football this morning…

I don't get into monkeys and vindication," he said. "I don't play that card. I know how hard I worked this season; I know how hard I worked this week." I don't get into monkeys and vindication," he said. "I don't play that card. I know how hard I worked this season; I know how hard I worked this week." – Mr. Everything

I I I I I I I I, and me me me me me me me me. Yo Payton, next time your offensive line “neglects” to throw a block and you end up forgetting how count beyond three, maybe you’ll remember it’s a team sport not the Quarterback Challenge at the sunny Bahia Mar Beach resort in Fort Lauderdale, Flordia. Congrats to the Indianapolis Colts TEAM, and despite what you tell those piano movers, they ARE saying loooooooooooser when chanting for you in the stands. Go bang a hot hollyweird starlet, sing karaoke with your brother, or stay out after curfew; just something to show you have a iota of a personality beyond confirming at every press conference that you control the team’s destiny like Luke in Return of the Jedi.

Yeah, the Bears won too. And left me 3 of 4 on my super duper kick ass parlay.

Bastards.

At least Sexy Rexy showed that ineptitude at the quarterback position can be overtaken by a front seven on defense that resembled Buddy Ryan’s D from the 85’ team. Urlacher is just fuckin scary, as in wielding a machete with a hockey mask, stabbing some chick in cotton panties as she has sex for the first at camp, and being resurrected 15 times scary. Peyton better wise up and take his front line out for a Sizzler’s buffet or two if he’d like be able to go home after the Super Bowl and watch some Lifetime movies with a bowl of low-fat, low sodium Orville’s Special Blend popcorn.

Want something that would ruin a decent breakfast? We dropped the kids off at my parent’s place, and mom is always watching Lifetime in the morning which 99.9% of time is about some relationship going awry and sure enough a bleached Dan Cortese is trying to rub one out before his wife gets through the door as her keys wouldn't work. Clearly an amateur spanking mistake by Mr. MTV Sports by not calculating when the Mrs. would be coming home. I also didn’t see a bottle of peppermint lotion.

Amateur.

Over/under on Sexy Rexy picks thrown in the Super Bowl? I’ll set the line at a conservative 2.5, but thinking four shouldn’t be too tough for him to hit enough Colts’ cornerbacks in the chest with a pass.

Excuse while I cut this short today because Wyatt greeted us with a night of taking care of his fever so sleep was cut to taking a short snooze in between the football games yesterday.

Thanks for dropping by, now how many people have signed up for ePassporte accounts? I’m on the fence about this and figuring I’ll just take a check when its time to cash out versus signing up for a soon-to-be-hit-by-the-DOJ-hammer eWallet.