Why does the shit storm always hit at work when you've got one hand on a Cap'n Coke, one ass-cheek sitting at a $5 Pai-GOW table, and your lips drooling over that Vanessa from Marigold, Missouri in the standard Vegas cocktail waitress dress that only covers up her nipples.
I'm buried under a sea of credit memos, ledgers, and meetings until punching out at 4:30 so do yourself a favor and hit up Pauly and Otis' coverage of the EPT Monte Carlo and live vicariously through the stories about eight dollar diet cokes and seeing people with pockets full of cash that would trump my net worth.
And for the artist formerly known as Bobby Bracelet:
Today is International Disadvantaged People's Day.
Please send an encouraging message to a retarded
friend, just as I've done.
I don't care if you lick windows, interfere with farm
animals, or occasionally shit yourself.......
You hang in there, Sunshine.
You're fucking special!