Thursday, June 30, 2005

I Want My Three Hours Back

I am steaming. I warn you dear reader or two the post you're about to read is real. The participates names have been changed to demeaning pseudonyms for maximum flammage. Due to the mature nature of this bad beat story viewer discretion is advised.

I played, I grinded, I lost. Three flippin hours down the fuckin tube. $3 rebuy tournament for entry into the Stars $500K guarantee, 438 hopefulls, 22 lucky winners, one $32 booby prize, and the rest go home with a story.

I'll keep the story to a minimum.

Late into the 3rd hour of tournament play, I had caught lucky by snapping off JJ with 33 when I had only 3BBs left and the blinds and antes were more then enough to make it push and pray time. I pushed, I prayed, I flopped a 3. Then, after blinding down a bit more I found AJo on the button. With only 5BBs left and knowing AJo is GOLD, I shoved for a blind steal. But, one of the 4 chip leaders of the tournament that just happened to be at the same table as I, woke up with 99. But, Joe's favorite hand defeated mine and I won the coin flip *shock* *awe*. Yes, I know you're terribly excited about reading this already, bear with me because I nearly threw my monitor after the next hand.

Its wasn't so much the beat itself, which I've grown accustomed to receiving several of them over the course of my losing streak. But, it was how this poor excuse for ass lint explained his Sherlock Holmes like problem-solving conclusion. Elementary my dear Watson you see, if you CALL an all in and know you're dominated RiverStars' "random" junk kicking computer will make sure you're safe from being dominated. Like I said, I'm steaming, bear with my drivel and I'll probably come back and play this game again.

The hand: I'm in the BB with T8000 after posting T1,200 and an ante of T75 and its folded around to the SB who has me barely covered and he raises to T3600. I have 66 and this guy has picked off my blind the last two orbits and seems to be on yet another steal. I had three options:

1) Give and go, call and insta-push with no Ace on the flop, if an Ace flops accept being crippled and continue to grind
2) Fold and look for a better spot to put my money in (back to push and pray mode)
3) Figure he's on a steal and I have either a coin-flip or better and push him off his bluff by pushing all-in and take in a decent pot

After I used half of my clock, I pushed. He thinks for about 10 seconds and calls. Not horrible, I figured I would need to win some coin fl.... oh wait he flipped up 65o. Not even sOOOted. Called. Then why did I feel the dread? It was probably the best thing he could show....

pokenum -h 6h 6s - 6d 5h
Holdem Hi: 1712304 enumerated boards
cards win %win lose %lose tie %tie EV
6s 6h 1440161 84.11 190501 11.13 81642 4.77 0.865
6d 5h 190501 11.13 1440161 84.11 81642 4.77 0.135

I lost to a runner-runner straight, but that's not what set me off. He explained in the chat box that he CALLED because....

"you took too long to bet"

Wow, I'd like to hear the EV math behind time elapsed when a player is making a decision and CALLING with a hand that at best has two live cards for 80% of your chips. I think I'll order a "nice call asshole" chip from Paul P. for this waste of air. I flammed him despite knowing that arguing would do nothing but enlarge my internet penis. Stupid, childish, and retarded for letting my emotions get to me but I wonder how much steam control a person can have after four months of getting cold decked like this?

Like I said, I'm pissed but I needed to get the beat out of my brain and onto the virtual world so I can trudge on like the good little grunt I am. You can turn the volume back up now, I got the beat story sludge out of my system now.

On to better things... 4TH OF JULY WEEKEND WHOO WHOO!!!

We're packing up things and a-heading out North, where women come equipped with fish and fake nets. Cause I wanna be a fish-er-man, baby. With the boat on the water and sunshine shining. Fish-er-man, baby.

Stop your booing! Ok so I don't have a future as a white rapper from Detroit (which would be tough since I live in Minnesota), but I do have a future catching some walleye, northerns, and crappies up in beautiful Ely, MN. Burnsie's parents are welcoming the troops into their place on a private lake for the extended weekend. Close your eyes and hear the loons calling, the trees reflecting off the clear lake, and the cold feel of that first beer of many that you'll consume this weekend in your hand. Ah, utopia wrapped in flannel it is. I'll probably throw a post up this weekend if I'm not golfing, drinking, playing cards, or watching the awesome fireworks display that the town puts on each year.

Thanks for dropping by and listening to my whines, I promise to keep them to a minimum in the future. And if I don't get the chance to post... Happy 4th of July everyone :)

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