I'd Like To Thank The Acad...

Oh, its time for Jimmy Kimmel Live???

My bad.

A shot clock on the speech for the biggest award, in the biggest yearly award show for films and “Crash” gets called for a 30 second lane violation because we needed to watch some overpriced commercial and hurry up to get to watch Ben Stein’s question reader’s late night show.

Good call ABC!!

I admit to not wanting to watch the Oscars since I go to a movie in a theater about once every Presidential election year (however Curious George was pretty cool). But some ladies mentioned various orbs of flesh bouncing in and out of ten thousand dollar dresses and I’m impartial to watching such things so why not lose some money playing poker while “Girls Gone Mild: Oscars Edition” was on.

Queen L. looked very pretty, Selma could talk in double speak and I’d hang on every vowel, but the rest looked like they’ve chewing on tree bark and leaves. As I’ve pleaded to Lindsay Lohan “EAT A FUCKIN SANDWICH ALREADY!!!”. Is it the Matterhorn sized tables of coke (not the caffeine-free stuff)? Or Jenny Craig's Extreme dieting for actors who want to look like they’re on a hunger strike for the mistreatment of people trying to give an acceptance speech for the biggest Oscar of all? The only sports analogy I could think of that would be worst was cutting into Suzy Kolber as she’s interviewing the Super Bowl MVP on the stage at the 50 yard line right after the game has ended and cutting off Hines Ward mid-sentence to replay the Brown N’ Bubbly abortion of a commercial then going straight to the local news story about Ole Petersen’s struggle with the dependency on using too much lye in his lutefisk.

But, I don’t know much about film or Hollywood so hop over to our film industry expert for her takes on the night (I’m sure she’ll have a post up soon about the Oscars).

Poker is bad for me right now as I’m struggling with the variance concept. My one big win this weekend came after a draw hit, instead of nailing a decent hand with good pre-flop cards. I watched huge pots get shoved in directions of people who played poor cards pre-flop, worst post-flop, and still hit their (insert under 5 outer whine here).

But, I trudge on.

The bankroll has been getting hit more then Anna Benson’s husband lately but I feel comfortable with the losses despite those fat pots not going my way. Another psychological brain-fart that’s entered my few brain waves that still fire occasionally… folding the winning hand. Its not bad enough that you lost due to I_BANG_Sheep69’s two outer hitting, but watching your draw come in after folding when the pot/implied odds were not there for you to continue with hand. You probably sit there looking at those virtual chips getting shuttled off into someone else’s hand and wonder why you folded your inside straight draw to three all-in’s KNOWING your card was coming. Over time it evens out I’m told, or have read in the many tomes of poker verbage out there for consumption.

This is what separates the poker players from the gamblers. The ability to wait out variance and not to go bust because of some bad breaks and start chasing cards. I hope to become a poker player someday, like tomorrow :) Right now I struggle with choosing the right games, knowing when to gamble and when to conserve, and how to handle losing streaks (continue playing at the same level, move down, etc…).

One thing for sure, I can handle losing to friends 100 times better then a random internet avatar. A home game was called out on Friday and yours truly was in charge of herding the cats together for a night of Texas Hold Em’ (cause we don’t play dem 4 or 7 card games ‘round here). About 15 guys gathered over at my brother’s house for a fun night of slinging cards and insults about not getting out enough. I won’t go into detail but I managed two cashes, two bubble finishes in four tourneys, and one neatly placed hangover as we started at eight o’clock and didn’t deal out the final suckout until past three in the morning and still managed to bring Little Drizz to Chuck E Cheese for Skee-ball and greasy pizza goodness seven hours after getting home! When your life is work, potty training, and a 17 inch monitor filled with blinking lights, an occasional “guys night out” is needed (in a non-Brokeback way, but not that there’s anything wrong with that).

I love being a dad and a husband but I need to be Dave once in a while to keep my sanity.

Thanks for dropping by, now go congratulate Otis on yet another major cash in a tourney. No, it was not the World Series of Pai Gow but he’ll have the buy-in covered should such an event ever comes out. Get the salty dogs and padded floors ready.