Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Donkey errr... Emu Poker!

Dude, you've got a couple hairs sticking up.

Yeah, that's good.

No poker-y goodness for me last night as I had marital things to attend to and softball.

You gave up a night of online poker for co-ed softball and sex?

Yes, yes I did.

A perfect night with good breeze to shoo the 10 million mosquitoes that attack unsuspecting outfielders around this time of year. We took both games rather quickly, and not from my usual dazzling offensive explosion as I hit a few constellations while poping up in the first game. Second game, I smacked a nice long home run to make sure the pitcher with his Kent Tekulve looks and delivery knew what's up. Stop throwing that weak submarine shit or get taken downtown!

You're playing slo-pitch softball dipshit.


This league is more of a family affair then competition. We play against long-time former teammates and cousins. Ribbing the umpire and taunting the pitcher is acceptable for the most part. We're 6-1-1 and have won by the mercy rule 5 times (10 run lead after four innings). This is in stark contrast to the summer league when we were the ones getting beat up. What happened? We have the same players, and we're playing basically the same teams so why are we winning?

Warning possible poker tie-in incoming!!

We got better with practice.

All through the summer league my sister, and reknown klutz, has gone from striking out every at bat to hitting the ball with regularity because of practicing. It doesn't go far mind you, but the simple fact that she makes the other team get her out defensively increases her chances of getting on base by 100%. That's a big number and a big help when 10% of the lineup isn't an automatic out.

My game needs practice, its how you get better, so I've been told by many people who have offered their help in getting me out of this rut in my game (thank you all!!).

Allen, don't look at me like that.

Taking time off for an extended time might revert my game back to when I was hugging a poker hand strength chart and not understanding why my aces got cracked with eight people in the pot.

I've vowed after completing my round of bonus whoring for the WPBT Vegas trip, that I'll be taking a more serious approach to play. I'm not going back to playing NLHE yet. I'll be sticking with what is profitable for me (PLO8) . But no more playing three tournaments and two ring games while in the blogger chat room and watching Sassy use her toys with the limberness of an Cirque du Soleil performer in her $4.99/min "private chats".

One or two tables will be open and only the same variation of poker (no more playing H.O.R.S.E. at the same time). The IM chatting is still a must because what's poker without the social aspect of it? Yes, I want to become more serious about learning but if you can't fun with a hobby why do it?

Now for the Donkey err... Emu poker part. I've signed up for a bar freeroll. Yes, they've gotten so popular here in Minnesota you need to call ahead to reserve a spot. So, I'll be getting some live play practice in while downing a few Cap'n Cokes at Boston's in Maple Grove tonight at 7:30pm. If you're in the area call em up and I'll be the guy wearing a UB cap, a grey Full Tilt t-shirt, and tight Absolute Poker pajama bottoms with my apple green iPod and mirrored shades on.

If you detect sarcasm in the last sentence about my wardrobe, give yourself a pat on the back. If you don't then you're probably my wife as she'd expect me to wear something like that.

Thanks for dropping by, here's a complete list of bar tourneys in Minnesota. Most of the Monday night games have switched to other days due to people's attraction to listening to John Madden mumble for three hours about football.

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