Thursday, July 03, 2008

Somebody Needs a New Hobby

This is news? I cry everytime my Aces get cracked and when Lindsay Lohan is not on TMZ, do I get a feature in the local rag?

An open letter to Brett Farve:

Brett,

I would most welcome your return for one game to the National Football League. Your intensity for the game would warm the coals of competition between our two clubs. Remember playing Tecmo-Bowl as a kid and how Lawrence Taylor just flew by the offensive lineman like they just ate a twenty pound bowl of General Tso's chicken with fried rice and a dozen cream cheese wontons?

That's me.

Re-think this "return" before you end up babbling about getting hit by a purple bus while doing easy sudoku puzzles hopped up on vicodin and PBR on the back porch of your home.

Sincerely,
*Jared Allen

**In related news John Madden is currently at home wacking off to Farve's appearent return while spamming the refresh button of ESPN.com in hopes that half of his in-game material will return to play.

Cabin life for me this weekend, maybe a little live poker to write home about. Gentile summit, 8 days, manliness about to run wild on Chicago and aspiring tennis pro DP will be there too. Peace.



* He should write this letter

** Would he use regular crisco or butter flavored

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