Ding! You've Been Facebook'd

Steven Segal prior to blimping out into some stay puff kung fu master with a komodo on, kicked ass with great lines such as “the first one thought he invincible, the other thought he could fly… they were both wrong”. There’s scene in the movie below (with awesome subtitles!) where a top secret password is held by two ranked officers trying to get it on while on this train, the crazy terrorist guy has to type in the password on two keyboards simultaneously to gain control over the super-cool satellite that causes earthquakes and blows things up while looking like an overgrown Lite-Bright floated above earth.



While I was not pressured to follow through on global destruction, last night after the Battle of the Planets finished up I saw that both the Sunday Warm-up and Turbo Takedown were winding down at the same time. Using a high stepping shuffling technique seen by defending basketball players, I moved back and forth until the two tourneys finished up and still got to dream about my three-way with Lindsay Lohan and Jessica Biel inside my penthouse suite at the Imperial Palace at a decent hour (ok, dreaming about Vegas in December already may have seeped in). The Turbo Takedown deserves a note as there was deal that the railboys and girls had a hey-day over as it seemed that only one of final three had ever made a deal before, and to be nice, they got screwed over big time because the chip leader managed to give himself a shot at MORE THEN first place money with the chop. Check out that deal in the write ups linked above.

Bonus money may be the sweetest money (copywrite Joe Speaker), but money from cheeseheads and stinkin Badger fans makes me giggle like seeing illicit boobies while through the movie channels. Gophers hockey, I have a man-crush on you. But, am saddened by the news of a huge Gophers hockey fan and Gophers hockey TV analyst losing his job as my favorite radio team was split up on Friday when Jeff Dubay’s recent drug arrest turned the P.A. and Dubay show into The Paul Allen show. Rube Nation is lost without you.

Speaking of Rube Nation, how pissed off are they about our apparently juiced up Pro Bowlers? Nice job guys, even 100% Cheese Free is probably in discontent about this team.

A question for whoever got me to start up my Facebook page… you now have sucked in a vortex of people from Minnesota into this endless pool of quizzes, addicting add-ons, and pokes. Speaking of pokes… how many pokes or the wondrously fabulous SUPERPOKE! do you need to receive from the wife (not to be confused with The Wife who sadly still roots for those limpburger cheeseheads to the east of the Twin Cities) before you cash them in for 15 seconds of fun in the sack?

September: Not Missing You

Found the couch for a little bit of football action yesterday:

Redskins still looking for respect from the football talking heads (and hopefully found it this weekend). Listening to a podcast from KFAN last week with Adam Caplan chatting about how the Cowboys would walk all over the Skins last week without Jason Taylor.

Oops. Think he said the same about yesterday's Skins/Eagles tilt too?

Texas April looking for the Stabbing app for her blackberry and is currently skiptracing for Sage Rosenfels address after he single handedly passing over a win in the fourth quarter to a Manning brother. What in the name of Mark Duper was he trying to do for that first down that ended in a Colts fumble recovery for a TD?

Even I picked the Pack over Atlanta. Wow. Due to potential karma issues I will refrain from comments but curse Rodgers for another strong showing after I benched him in favor of the Manning brother that did not win the Super Bowl last year.

Thanks to Kissing Suzy Kolber, I am unable to watch a Pittsburgh Steelers game without thinking that Big Ben is asking Hines Ward for a Choco-taco in the huddle and subsequent laughter occurring.

Anyone else have DeAngelo Williams in yesterday? No? Learn the Ronnie Brown rule of fantasy football that if you sit a starting running back with a decent backup he will break out for a 30+ point day. Look for Fred Taylor to bust out for 125 and two scores in his next start.

Tonight you will either see the Brad Childress era come to a lame-duck end (odds are he'll be fired at the end of the season regardless of record this season) or start up some hype about the Vikes making a playoffs run. When did the NFC North become the NFC West? Besides the Lions looking their usual cream puffs selves, the other three teams are over-achieving for 7-9 end of the season records.

Drinkability ads for Bud Light need to die a quick death. That beer shouldn’t even be used to fry up brats let alone find its way to mouths of thirsty Class E softball players. Michelob Ultra and Natty Ice has more beer taste then this beer pong favorite.

Perhaps Bash stories tomorrow, perhaps not. Everyone say hi to my newest Facebook friend, my wife! I was immediately turned down with my “friends-with-benefits” request from her which ranks up there with getting my date for prom request shot down by my high school girlfriend in the middle of the hallway with all her big haired Z. Cavaricci-sporting preppy friends within an ear shot. Spending prom night watching “The Last Dragon” and knocking one out to fuzzy porn that came in if you knew the right trick on cable was much more productive then securing the right pink corsage and learning how to slow dance without grabbing her ass.