Monday, July 10, 2006

I Am A Grinder, I Am A Machine

But not that well bankrolled, nor am I good at poker, and I don't have a cool hat either.

Somehow I'll manage to live.

Back from your trip? How was the attempt to keep up with StB and Al? Hungover or currently getting a new liver before leaving McCarran airport?

Good.

Lucky bastards.

I’ll be there in December barring some fantastically stupid poker flame out while grinding away (or life getting in the way again), I’ll be knocking back Cap’n Cokes with a blinding pace at Mandalay Bay while betting on horses that can barely spell f-i-n-i-s-h (are you listening Mr. Otis????). Judging by the pics from Pauly, another great blogger get-together went off sans this whining pixie stick. And you let some other pixie stick win it all, grats to F-Train!!!!!

And this time, if you see me playing penny slots at three a.m., please direct my not-so-sober ass to the card room, a strip club, or my bed. The orgy of blinking cartoon characters and cartoonish sized breasts on the waitresses and hookers keeps me up way too long while visiting sin city and I end up a mumbling idiot by day three. And that’s no way to enjoy the company of all you folks, especially if you’re trying to meet everyone for the first time.

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Due to some sage advice, I’ve reverted back a level in play for a little while to get my fish gills pointed in the right direction again. Want to see how serious you are about the game, and not about results? Play for stakes four to ten times less then usual and if you still hear yourself deducing your opponent’s hand when faced with a big river re-raise and/or silently cursing when that (put # of outs here) hit for that future donator, you’re stepping in the right direction.

When looking back at the board’s result that didn’t favor you, its ok to have a snap reaction of “there’s my great luck shinning through like a beacon of putrid moth riddled lighthouse light”. Its how you recover from the “beat” that marks how you can/will progress as a player. If your personality does not allow you to be totally numb to the cards coming out, then work on bringing down your recovery time from losing that hand you were a favorite to win at. Personally, I have lost much more then I should have because I allowed my emotions to get in the way of sound poker play after a so-called “beat”. After getting (put wonderfully beautiful, stupendiously awesome pre-flop hand here) cracked by some trash hand that had no business in the hand after the money went in (big difference between putting money in when you’re a favorite and the hand values pre-flop and if you don’t know that, go back to poker 101) you should be able to make the same decisions as you did on hand one of your session.

Ok, that’s my monthly quota of bad poker advice, I’ll leave you to scourge the rest of the internets for tips on how to lose but look good while doing it.

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If you didn’t see Zidane’s headbutt from the World Cup yesterday, you’re missing out on a metaphor why shootouts are no way to end such a match. Can you really conclude four years of qualifiers/training/injuries/hot Brazilian chicks in dental floss thin bikinis with the equivalent of a basketball free throw? Play it out, let the athletes conditioning and temperament determine a winner, not the ability to guess which way the goalie is going to jump. There’s more excitement in reaching into an bag of food from an Arby’s drive thru and finding out you got extra Arby Sauce then watching grown men/a country cry because one of them didn’t guess correctly after several brutal matches. It had the feel of a turbo SnG, being forced to play push poker vs. more bluff re-raises and true poker play.

Refs, diving, stupid shootouts for elimination matches. I know I’m not the only one that would have enjoyed the World Cup more if these issues were looked as closely as Posh Spice’s panties reaction to Mr. Beckham’s goal.

Thank you for dropping by, now if you’re still here please proceed to refreshing everyone else’s blog for WPBT Caesar’s Palace recaps.

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