This Post is Sho'Nuff Approved

Should I start the gloating now, or let it simmer until tomorrow? :)

I've got the GLOW of post-sex V-I-C-T-O-R-Y!!!!!!!

I'll wait till tomorrow after I clean up my mess. SKOL CHEESEHEADS!!!!! Since I agreed to a uniform for the beer bitch, what shall I choose? Maybe take something from Bam-Bam's page? :)

Ryan Fee Charges the Field in San Jose

Tonight, I'm on duty for the Sunday Warm-up, someone make a final table for once!!!

Press release from the recent LAPT event win by Ryan Fee from PokerStars:

POKERSTARS LAPT SEASON TWO KICKS OFF WITH AMERICAN RYAN FEE WINNING SAN
JOSE CHAMPIONSHIP AND $285,773

2008 Latin American Poker Tour –
NOVEMBER 7, 2008 -- A former college student turned poker pro won his
first major tournament today. Ryan Fee, a 20-year-old online poker player from
Philadelphia, PA won one of Costa Rica’s biggest poker events ever. The
international poker tournament, which attracted players from five different
continents and 33 different countries, was the first event of Season
Two on the Latin American Poker Tour sponsored by PokerStars.net.

Fee topped a
highly-competitive field of 219 players and won the top cash prize of more than
a quarter million dollars. The tournament which cost $3,700 to enter was
one of the highest buy-in events ever held in the Latin America. In fact, this
year’s entry fee was $1,000 more than last year – which served as the inaugural
LAPT offering. Nonetheless, Fee – who plays poker regularly at PokerStars and
who admitted he had very little live tournament experience – won a most
impressive victory.

The three-day event was held at the Ramada
Plaza Herradura Conference Centre in San Jose. Adorned in Costa Rican flags and
PokerStars banners, the tournament room provided the flavor of an international
sporting event. The tournament's final hand was typical of three exciting
days of poker action. Fee was dealt A-10. His opponent Joel Micka was
dealt 4-4 and was out-chipped by a small margin. It appeared Micka might
win the big hand until the fateful river card was dealt -- an ace which gave Fee
the Costa Rican poker championship. The final board showed K-Q-7-8-A,
giving Fee a winning pair of aces.

Fee says that he plans to play
in more upcoming LAPT tournaments, including next month's tournament in Nuevo
Vallarta, Mexico. But first, Fee will return to his home in
Philadelphia. "I want to be home for Thanksgiving," Fee
said. "But after that, I am going to play as many LAPT events as I can.
This victory feels just great."

Based on yet another successful
LAPT event, poker in Latin America is here to stay. "We are extremely excited to
have launched LAPT Season 2, by returning here to San Jose, surrounded by the
beautiful tropics of Costa Rica,” said Glenn Cademartori, LAPT President. “We
were fortunate enough to host such a great tournament in a spectacular venue for
our Latin American players, as well as players from 33 countries around the
globe."

“Ryan Fee is a great young champion and was quite taken
aback having won our biggest first prize to date. He is a sharp guy and has
certainly made his mark in the poker industry with this win. We look forward to
seeing him in Mexico next month,” Cademartori added. “We are quite pleased with
how smoothly the tournament ran and received plenty of praise from our satisfied
players. Many of them will be joining us for our next stop in Nuevo Vallarta,
Mexico, December 5-7. We’re breaking new ground in Mexico, just as we did in
Brazil last Season. We have created the new standard for the Latin American
poker experience.”

Last year’s LAPT Season One attracted 1,063
players in just three events. Season 2, will include as many as six events and
promises to be considerably bigger with tournaments planned for Mexico, Chile,
Brazil, Uruguay, and Argentina.

Satellites for the LAPT Neuvo
Vallarta event are available daily at PokerStars. Players have the chance to win
a prize package which includes a main event buy-in, accommodation for four
nights, and spending money for expenses. Please visit http://www.lapt.com/
for more information and updates on the tour dates and how to qualify.

Furiously In Love

Three Growlers: one of each Furious, Cynic , and Bender

If you're a beer lover, its hard to go wrong with Surly which is one of the best in the world fresh from the tap and only a 10 minute drive from Casa De Drizz!!

The question is... which one will carry the Vikes to victory tomorrow?

Packers vs. Vikes (For the love of all that is holy win one f'in time)

Loser of the wager is the other person's beer/drinks/food/massage bitch for the NFL games on Sunday.

Deal?

Coach Childress, you're on notice if you lose #6 in a row to the lowly Pack.

When Eating Is Not Your Friend

Wish I could bang out a couple of words on my recent poker forays but I'll be too busy today diving in and out of the bathroom thanks to my son's ability to attract viral cells and distribute them with the efficiency of army ants rebuilding their hill after disgruntled homeowners sweep one out of their garage.

For poker goodness, I suggest checking out the team of Otis and F-Train tearing up the Puerto Rico stop of the PokerStars LAPT. Scroll backwards from this post to get a feel for Ryan Fee's victory there.

I fixed the link to the wonderful Channel 4 website with cheeseheads display their lack of civic knowledge. Jay Leno-esqe video goodness is included.

With that said its Pack vs. Vikes week. How could I possibly embarrass myself this time in my bet with The Wife?

I'll leave the suggestions to you the reader as my colon's spidey sense of fecal matter is going off yet again. Long live the BRAT diet!

...

Starting at Quarterback: #44 Barack Obama

This is our chance to answer that call. This is our moment. This is our
time - to put our people back to work and open doors of opportunity for our
kids; to restore prosperity and promote the cause of peace; to reclaim the
American Dream and reaffirm that fundamental truth - that out of many, we are
one; that while we breathe, we hope, and where we are met with cynicism, and
doubt, and those who tell us that we can't, we will respond with that timeless
creed that sums up the spirit of a people:

Yes We Can. Thank you, God bless you, and may God Bless the United
States of America.

Cheers to hopefully "getting there".

Obama's acceptance speech highlights @ Yahoo! Video

Locally however, I was disappointed the educational levy was defeated again possibly bringing further cuts for the kids who were shuffled around after last year's levy narrowly lost out. Yet, Minnesotans willingly asked for a 25 year sales tax increase despite pleas that such increase was uneccessary to upkeep our wildlife and lakes.

Now comes the wait and see period like an expectant father snacking on Cinnamon flavored Teddy Grahams in the hospital waiting room that wussed out on watching the alien shoot out of their wives/girlfriend's ever expanding love tunnel. Will Americans buy into the above speech? Or will they start printing "Don't Blame Me, I Voted For McCain" bumper stickers before January 20th?

You Stay Classy Madison

Click here for the link to the news story from the OFFICIAL PACKERS STATION and watch the video.

Be afraid that some of these cheeseheads went to the polls tonight to vote Susan B. Anthony in as the new Queen or may go fishing in the Nile after work today.

Wednesday Update: LINK FIXED!!!!!

Lining Up For the Vote

Are we voting in the lesser of two evils today?

One sounds like all wealth of the US is about to get thrown up in the air and whoever has the highest vertical or loudest bullhorn will be pocketing it.

The other is a partial return to the past eight years with eye candy and future totally-mavericky SNL skits this time.

Rebuttals to the statements above are welcome.

The "interviews" on Monday Night Football last night? I thought both stumbled thru Boomer's hard-hitting questions *cough* but McCain walked away the victor with the rubes by using the "he-could-go-all-the-way" line that died out with Generra Hypercolor t-shirts and crimped hair you could surf on. Props again for McCain reaching out to Joe Six-Pack versus Joe the Plumber, smart move that might have won a few ESPN-type sport dudes votes.

I'm sure people have received this email this morning:

2008 PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE COMPARISON TALKING POINTS ISSUE

JOHN McCAIN - BARACK OBAMA

Favors new drilling offshore US
Yes-No

Will appoint judges who interpret the law not make it
Yes-No

Served in the US Armed Forces
Yes-No

Amount of time served in the US Senate
22 YEARS-173 DAYS

Will institute a socialized national health care plan
No-Yes

Supports abortion throughout the pregnancy
No-Yes

Would pull troops out of Iraq immediately
No-Yes

Supports gun ownership rights
Yes-NoS

Supports homosexual marriage
No-Yes

Proposed programs will mean a huge tax increase
No-Yes

Voted against making English the official language
No-Yes

Voted to give Social Security benefits to illegals
No-Yes

CAPITAL GAINS TAX
MCCAIN
0% on home sales up to $500,000 per home (couples). McCain does not propose any change in existing home sales income tax.
OBAMA
28% on profit from ALL home sales. (How does this affect you? If you sell your home and make a profit, you will pay 28% of your gain on taxes. If you are heading toward retirement and would like to down-size your home or move into a retirement community, 28% of the money you make from your home will go to taxes. This proposal will adversely affect the elderly who are counting on the income from their homes as part of their retirement income.)

DIVIDEND TAX
MCCAIN15% (no change)
OBAMA39.6% - (How will this affect you? If you have any money invested in stock market, IRA, mutual funds, college funds, life insurance, retirement accounts, or anything that pays or reinvests dividends, you will now be paying nearly 40% of the money earned on taxes if Obama becomes president. The experts predict that 'Higher tax rates on dividends and capital gains would crash the stock market, yet do absolutely nothing to cut the deficit.')

INCOME TAX
MCCAIN(no changes)Single making 30K - tax $4,500Single making 50K - tax $12,500Single making 75K - tax $18,750Married making 60K- tax $9,000Married making 75K - tax $18,750Married making 125K - tax $31,250
OBAMA (reversion to pre-Bush tax cuts)Single making 30K - tax $8,400Single making 50K - tax $14,000Single making 75K - tax $23,250Married making 60K - tax $16,800Married making 75K - tax $21,000Married making 125K - tax $38,750

INHERITANCE TAX
MCCAIN- 0% (No change, Bush repealed this tax)OBAMARestore the inheritance taxMany families have lost businesses, farms, ranches, and homes that have been in their families for generations because they could not afford the inheritance tax. Those willing their assets to loved ones will only lose them to these taxes.

NEW TAXES PROPOSED BY OBAMA

New government taxes proposed on homes that are more than 2400 square feet. New gasoline taxes.New taxes on natural resources consumption (heating gas, water, electricity)New taxes on retirement accounts; and,New taxes to pay for socialized medicine so we can receive the same level of medical care as other third-world countries!!! You can verify the above at the following web sites:

http://money.cnn.com/news/specials/election/2008/index.html
http://www.cnn.com/ELECTION/2008/issues/issues.taxes.htmlhttp://elections.foxnews.com/?s=proposed+taxes
http://bulletin.aarp.org/yourworld/politics/articles/mccain_obama_offer_different_visions_on_taxes.htmlhttp://blog.washingtonpost.com/fact-checker/candidates/barack_obama/
http://blog.washingtonpost.com/fact-checker/candidates/john_mccain/

Anyone have the Obama version of a chain email?

Any chance voters could line veto the issues by each candidate and build some Six-Million Dollar (to build Lee Majors is probably close to $21 million in today's dollars) presidential hopeful ?

I will be voting despite having to throw the proverbial dart on the wall since neither candidate for president nor the senate race between Franken and Coleman really jumps out as a clear winner in my book.

My wife, who got to school at six a.m. this morning, told me people were lined up at the building to vote nearly two hours before the polls open; like the day after Thanksgiving and only three $10 40 inch flat-screen TVs were being sold at Target. Even with the sense of national apathy as 401k plans are tanking faster then a dump taken after the Conquistador special washed down by five shots of Patron Silver at Don Pablos, people are going to let their voices be heard today.

That’s at least a start.

When Can I Jump On the Bandwagon?

In the world of “yes, I’d like more please” are the expansion of the NFL season to 18 games instead of the current 16 and more soccer wags (is that the term?) or groupies or whatever the proper term for proper football hotties like the ones standing here nicely squared up for team spirit reasons can be found in various stages of undress.

Or I could always hit up Al for more such pictoral perfection of the female form.

Obama-mania or John "The Mavericky One" McCain. Whoever wins tomorrow please remove your executive ass from my television set unless there's peace in the middle east and my friend doesn't have to say his round of goodbyes again or NASA came up with a new way to prevent stupid from coming out of my mouth. The out-of-body experience of listening to the sounds of my vocal chords bounce into the air this weekend and at the same exact moment wanting to apply a spiked sledgehammer forcefully to my jaw to prevent the lowering the IQs of even the townie barfly with the fake eyelashes, bebe shirt stretched to the max, and stripper glitter trying too hard to hit on a group of seven married guys.

Stupid is, stupid does, and left wondering how to turn the faucet of bad one-liners off before I end up playing for an audience of one in a nice, pink padded cell with the complete works of Mozart looping in the background.

Schaub-y gots owie and I didn't receive one taunt from she-who-actually-watches-that-team. Unfortunately for the lovely Texas April, the Vikes decided to take the +7 Water Pill of Pigskin Dominance yesterday.

Jared Allen - bigger bulldozer then Hevad Khan with a 20:1 heads up chip lead. Multiple times his blocker's back found the Metrodome turf while Schaub and Rosenfeld's faces matched their jerseys when they got an intimate viewing of his sweat band.

Bernard Berrian - earning his paycheck with receiving not seen since Moss got a lifelong Vikes fan to attend a football game somewhere besides the Met or that plastic bubble on Kirby Puckett's named street

Visanthe Shiancoe - whatever hobby store is supplying that glove adhesive, I suggest a marketing deal for purchasing their stock of 5:1 ratio 60's muscle cars and three stage rockets in return of your recent ability to catch a football

The Williams Kids - Stop hitting up Old Country Buffet's prime rib night and stick to rice cakes to make weight.

For the first time this year the Vikes didn't backdoor into a win/loss, they earned the outcome and if you want Exhibit 1a of how a good team can go from looking like the 1998 Vikes to the 1984 Les Steckel experiment, the Cowboys/Giants game yesterday should be the new PSA for all NFL teams looking to just get by with a 57 year old backup or a career benchwarmer looking to run the wishbone offense. Ugly game.

On a brighter note for those waiting for Romo's pinky to heal for football throwing not Shocker purposes, while out with the guys this weekend I found a four pack of this for the cagey one, which I'll purchase once the Vegas trip becomes closer to smelling the gambling despiration waft thru the Imperial Palace lobby. Tough beer to find despite living within midget throwing distance of the brewery for whatever reason.

And for Viking fanboi purposes... PACKERS SUCK!

There, I've completed this week's turn on the bandwagon.

My Prediction is: Human

Love these people who are "willingly" giving up McDonald's Monopoly pieces for a share of the winnings if someone has a "rare" piece (are there people this dumb?) which carry the same odds of a car in downtown Phildelphia not catching fire or having a caved in roof from phinatics dancing on top of them tonight.

Congrats on being this year's World Champs, Phillies. You may be the losingest team in the history of baseball, but not tonight.

I see that this guy and this woman found some time to do this (not a Rick Roll or prOn link you perverts). Godspeed to you both, may the journey be filled with loving sighs and quiet snuggles in the rocking chair more often then the "again?!?! what #!#$!$@ time is it?!?!?!".

Being degenerate gamblers, shall we start up a betting pool on the sex?

The line was set by Covers.com found on USAToday.com

Male: +120

Female: -150

I'm a Donkey... Just Not THAT Kind

You stay classy lawmakers:

An embattled Massachusetts state senator appeared in a federal courtroom today charged with taking $23,500 in bribes, including cash that she stuffed into her bra during a meeting at a tony Boston restaurant that was secretly videotaped by an undercover FBI agent, federal prosecutors said...

Link is complete with bra stuffing goodness! Gotta pay for littering lawns with those obscene VOTE FOR ANDERSEN FOR COUNTY ELM TREE LEAF AUDITOR signs and wonderful eardrum ripping negative campaign ads that run more often then asses at a Taco Bell after a rack of volcano tacos (they're hot!).

Further down article are possible perjury and tax-evasion charges added on to this state Senator in 15th year of bringing community service home with an apple pie baked with a dash of bribery.

The message is the same as two years ago, throw em' out, put in someone new. Does it solve much? Or do people take the same strawman stance as those businesses getting the shakedown from mob associates named Vinnie the Snake and his steel asp pressuring you for protection money? National revolution will never happen because people like their iPods, SUVs, and $100 pedicures done by over worked Vietnamese women donning face mask in a locally convenient place but gradual change can happen with your town. A vote for Obama or McCain may go up against tens of millions but a vote for a mayor would be heard much more intimately.

While I'm far removed from taking a political side, personally I have read up on what the canadiates stand for and will be voting accordingly as more "die-hard" Republicans and Democrat are doing.

That is change. Perhaps a small bright spot under the old Victoria's Secrets microflex bras being stuffed with bricks instead of boobs.

In poker news: Please turn off my year-long doom switch. Thanks.

Questioning Your Faith

Lately the three year old in me has come out with endless questions about the grass being green, sky being blue, and why people feel the need to race their motorized vehicles with the vigor of a Nascar driver when the white flag comes out towards the row of fiery-red brake lights and stop close enough for car spooning?

Why won’t presidential candidates shut the fuck up and stop waffling my vote (Today, Obama gets it)?

Why must people insist on walking thru life like an ostrich and hope someone else gets the work done?

Why does a bag of popcorn cost $.99 everywhere else except the movies?

Why does the flu strike in the fall but not the summer?

Why is watching a Baywatch-esqe chest bounce fascinating, while watching a beer gut swish revolting?

Why don’t my kids behave like that all the time?

Why do I constantly hurt, yet feel happy?

Why does this site (thanks to Waffles) bring me back to the days of just above minimum wage while donning the red and khaki? Had many-a-days like the story below:

(At the clothing store where I work, I’ve spent hours folding and sizing jeans into a wall display. A customer comes up starts to look for her size.)

Me: “Hi there! How are you today? My name is ***. Can I help you find the size or style of jeans you are looking for today?”

Customer: “No, I’m just looking… thanks.”

Me: “Alright. Well, you just let me know if you need any help.”

(As I go back to folding jeans, she pulls out a pile I’ve already fixed, proceeds to destroy it and shoves it back in the wall.)

Me: “Are you sure I can’t help you find what you are looking for?”

Customer: “Nah, I’m alright.”

(She destroys pile number #2.)

Me: *wincing* “I might be able to help you find the size you are looking for a little faster…”
Customer: “It’s okay, I’m fine.”

(She destroys pile number #3.)

Me: “Ma’am, please let me help you since I know where everything is.”

Customer: “I said I was okay! Don’t you people have better things to do than bug your shoppers?! I don’t need your help!”

Me: “Well, ma’am, I’m going to help you anyway. I’ve spent nearly six hours refolding and fixing this wall because customers like you come in and ruin it with no regard to the people who have to clean up your mess. Since we size things with the smallest size at the top and the largest size at the bottom, I suggest that you look somewhere near the bottom pile for your jeans!”

Customer: *jaw drops* “ARE YOU CALLING ME FAT?!”

Me: “No, I’m implying it.”
Customer: “WELL I NEVER!” *storms out*

(I got written up, but it was totally worth it!)

Why do people insist on others acting morally right when it’s an individual’s sense of morality that deems you morally correct?

Why do people insist you should go to church to find God and that he needs $10 million for a new rec center addition to the compound so kids can learn the apostles’ names while hitting jump shots?

Why do the wrong things come out of my mouth?

Why should BadBlood come to Vegas? One word: Rematch Two words: Pai Gow

Why do women expect men to have sexual ESP?

Why do I enjoy writing despite having zero book sense of the English language and all its grammatically difficult rules while leaving out words every other sentence?

Why did my child do that here but not there?

Why isn’t it December already (congrats to Pablo and Gracie!)?

Ding! You've Been Facebook'd

Steven Segal prior to blimping out into some stay puff kung fu master with a komodo on, kicked ass with great lines such as “the first one thought he invincible, the other thought he could fly… they were both wrong”. There’s scene in the movie below (with awesome subtitles!) where a top secret password is held by two ranked officers trying to get it on while on this train, the crazy terrorist guy has to type in the password on two keyboards simultaneously to gain control over the super-cool satellite that causes earthquakes and blows things up while looking like an overgrown Lite-Bright floated above earth.



While I was not pressured to follow through on global destruction, last night after the Battle of the Planets finished up I saw that both the Sunday Warm-up and Turbo Takedown were winding down at the same time. Using a high stepping shuffling technique seen by defending basketball players, I moved back and forth until the two tourneys finished up and still got to dream about my three-way with Lindsay Lohan and Jessica Biel inside my penthouse suite at the Imperial Palace at a decent hour (ok, dreaming about Vegas in December already may have seeped in). The Turbo Takedown deserves a note as there was deal that the railboys and girls had a hey-day over as it seemed that only one of final three had ever made a deal before, and to be nice, they got screwed over big time because the chip leader managed to give himself a shot at MORE THEN first place money with the chop. Check out that deal in the write ups linked above.

Bonus money may be the sweetest money (copywrite Joe Speaker), but money from cheeseheads and stinkin Badger fans makes me giggle like seeing illicit boobies while through the movie channels. Gophers hockey, I have a man-crush on you. But, am saddened by the news of a huge Gophers hockey fan and Gophers hockey TV analyst losing his job as my favorite radio team was split up on Friday when Jeff Dubay’s recent drug arrest turned the P.A. and Dubay show into The Paul Allen show. Rube Nation is lost without you.

Speaking of Rube Nation, how pissed off are they about our apparently juiced up Pro Bowlers? Nice job guys, even 100% Cheese Free is probably in discontent about this team.

A question for whoever got me to start up my Facebook page… you now have sucked in a vortex of people from Minnesota into this endless pool of quizzes, addicting add-ons, and pokes. Speaking of pokes… how many pokes or the wondrously fabulous SUPERPOKE! do you need to receive from the wife (not to be confused with The Wife who sadly still roots for those limpburger cheeseheads to the east of the Twin Cities) before you cash them in for 15 seconds of fun in the sack?

Chip To My Lou

If my parents went off to Vegas while I was awkwardly mastering Calculus in my ripped Umbro shorts and learning to speak to a girl’s face and not her chest (ask Waffles, its tougher then it looks!), they would bring me back two things:

- A parlay card from the sportsbook of the hotel they stayed at.

- And a blackjack chip from the casino floor.

The rounded mounds of clay were collected over the years, so when I became of age to lose my $8.75/hour job worth of gambling funds at the Frontier, Riveria, and Circus Circus, a $1 chip was going into my duffel bag for the ride home. Now those chips are displayed in the basement of my house all colorful and in various denominations according to if the dice or cards were hot at the time of collection.

Recently the first name in Poker Chips, Nevada Jacks, ask me to drop by their site to check out their wares as I’ve been searching for a decent set to go with my new-ish poker table. Being a chip collector the first part of the site I was interested in was their collection of Real Casino Poker Chips of various parts of the globe like the Ukraine, Aruba, and Puerto Rico. Personally, I love the metal in-lay chips and may have snag a few of these of my collection.

Next up was the famous Custom Poker Chips built to upgrade your home game from that set mom and dad thought you wanted at Christmas time last year. Color me amazed that the production time to crank out your new bank is only two weeks! As I’ve seen their product in action (and luckily some of those chips came in my direction), I can attest to the superior quality of their work.

If you’re in the market for a new poker chip set that will make your friends step and notice, head over to Nevada Jacks and have their customer service folks take care of minting your potential new home game bankroll.

Wandering in the Snow Drifts

You know its coming, yet still seemed surprised when the first snow flurries drop on the windshield. Why drop your head on something only the nightly weatherman/woman can control with their state-of-the-art Doppler radar and $4.6 million computer program that spits out pretty blobs of colors for the masses at 5, 6, and 10pm?

Bad things happen; the downtrodden reaction to those snow flurries, seemingly endless cries to not eat that pot roast, and bad river cards that cause $800 laptops to be used as expensive Frisbees and the reaction to those things is how the outlook on life comes about. Do I put on the stern parent mask and rapid fire a bunch of inane threats of jail time in the Transformers plastered bed or resign to the fact that the kid didn’t sleep much since our jobs require him to wake up when its still dark and is acting out from lack of dreamland? Which way satisfies both of us? Should I consult Parenting magazine’s feature on 15 ways to approve parent-child relations or a MBA management book from an author with more initials than I have letters in my name full of buzz words like “bubble up”, “best practices”, and “going forward” with a double viewing of Office Space?

Often the train is coming down the track yet time after time I pick to stand in front of it the same way. The mind says “dude, chill the fuck out”, while the parent says “HE/SHE NEEDS TO BE TAUGHT A LESSON!!!!111ONEONEONE”. There’s no conscious expectation for the kids to act like perfect robots that eat their veggies, sit down when told, and crank out a new US patent every day so we can get extra tokens at Chuck E. Cheese to get the 200 tickets fifty cent neon green colored koosh ball that last about two days before being regulated to the far corner of a toy box. Yet, I find myself getting upset over nothing earth shattering, they’re both healthy, wife is smiling more often, and I find myself staring at the pebbles making up the paved ground trying to solve the mystery of how IKEA’s low costing wares make a profit, and how I got to this point of gravel gazing with the pending snowflakes collect on my Members Only jacket while invading this northern state.

Is there a way to break the cycle of constant introspection and live-to-let-live? Or is it healthy to look at the mirror while gazing thru the icy blues into the person people meet-and-greet with daily over overpriced 20oz. logo’d coffee beans with added $.75 flavor shots or electronic means?

Then again, the story could have ended face down on a dirty floor of a faltering Las Vegas casino, and overpriced center of higher education, or a concert series campground and people wouldn’t have gotten to meet that person. Or gotten tips on how to run back for a fly ball without pulling a Jose Canseco and heading the ball English Premier League style over the fence.

Enduring the cold fingers thru a long winter is worth the few bright spots of friend’s smiles and family embraces which act as gloves that have been sitting next to the heated vent.

Everyone Should Wear Purple on Sundays

This song is addicting. Play at your own risk, hide your hetrosexuality if necessary (not that there's anything wrong with that).




And if you're going to play the lotto (I'm not talking about Pot Limit Omaha which is pissing me off to the point of picking up my g33k card and start playing Diablo II again) move to Virginia where 1 in 4 people managed to hit the top prize of $7,777 off a two dollar ticket.


For those not in the know, Bodog is returning for another tournament series. My participation will hinge on my daughter's ability to differentiate a toilet from the kitchen floor sometime soon.

You are invited to play in, post or forward this information.
The Bodog
Blogger Tournament is Back!
Start Time 9:05 pm ET.

You heard right, the rumors are true! The Bodog Blogger Tournament is
back!

The Bodog Poker Blogger Tournament Series officially returns Tuesday
October 28th, 2008 with special guest bounty player, professional poker player
and author, Eric "Rizen" Lynch.
Bodog is proud to host it's second Poker
Blogger Tournament Series, where poker bloggers worldwide are gathering Tuesday
and Thursday nights in the Bodog Poker Room.

More details available at the official blogger series site at http://www.bodogbloggertournament.com

Sign up for this tournament at http://www.bodoglife.com/promotions/poker/blogger-tournament/

So what are YOU waiting for?

Suck and Resuck

Under things that suck:

I got a chain email stating my contract with keepyourpokerface.com was cancelled. No personal words, just a chain letter. Not sure how to feel about it since work vs. pay was tipped to just bring in traffic versus applauding free thought. Somewhat relived that there’s no more deadlines and can focus a little more on a writing gig I care about versus being nothing more then a poker flag boy at the huge internet parking lot. Still, a little miffed at not getting a direct word on the pink slip (but I'm sure the Google bombing of internet ads had something to do with it).

Under things that don't suck:

Pictures from our recent drive over to the 101 Market's corn maze in Otsego. The fun part came with finding the six markers within the maze to spell out a phrase for a weekly $500 drawing (which sadly I did not win).

Ah, yes! I left my sister behind sign number two

Your frugal attempts to make me smile have been noted

Who in this picture needs a beer?

Bier Ist Gut

If someone would have walked up to me yesterday before the Vikes game and said they would score 41 and LOSE, I may have shown the same shocked face as a 300 pound co-worker coming up to me at six a.m. to explain in graphic detail her 24 hour lesbian 3-way tryst in Rio De Janeiro with Lindsay Lohan and Rosie O’Donnell right down to the double edged dildos and midget cabana boys singing 80’s hair band love ballads in Portuguese.

There’s some pointing to be done but its not at the offense for once as Visanthe Shiancoe decided to chisel enough rounded Italian marble off his digits to make some nice catches. Berrian earned his paycheck once again, and Purple Jesus knocked out a home run. Watching the offense click for once gave new life to the Purple’s season yesterday, but the usually stone walled defense got picked here and there and everywhere by that horrible pass rush. Kyle Orton had enough time to play a game of Beer Pong and sing a Jack Daniel’s soaked version of “When You Were Young” almost the entire game before the Vikings front line could get within whispering distance to tell him his next shot is ready at the bar.

Only a true Rube would find a way to pin this loss on those two special teams plays by Gordon’s bad bounce and Kluwe’s submission to NFL films as the next fumbling-bumbling kicker to be repeated next to Garo Yepremian’s attempt to throw. Kluwe is no Bo Jackson as seen here.

We’ll see if this offense makes another appearance after the bye week while the defense finds its mojo again and doesn’t have to rely on quarterbacks that run into the entrance tunnel while dropping back to pass to win a game.

Oktoberfest at my place was a success. By success of course I saw the aftermath and must have been a good time as the fifty pound tree stump was still burning in the fire pit the next morning, three recycling bins full of German type beer bottles and girlish Mich Ultras. My friends knocked it out of the park with kielbasa soaked in apples, brown sugar, and garlic along with an assortment of meat gluttony and deserts that tickled the tongue when the eye sight got a little blurry. My hope they had a good time despite the lack of busty dirndl sporting ladies.

Its been awhile since I’ve gushed about the spawns, look for pictures tomorrow.

Hmmmm Hairballs

A note of advice to those attempting to get laid within the next month or so:

Being woken up by the cat puking on the edge of your bed can sour results of removing the panties of your loved one.


Have a great Friday.

Eye For an I

The Red Sox lose and 99% of the baseball loving public applauds. Except for Las Vegas sportsbooks who offered odds of 200-1 or more for the Rays to win the World Series. Anyone take a flyer on these guys while in Vegas for the NCAA tourney?

Roy Williams spent last night dancing on stars, strip club table tops, and probably took double J’s private jet as quickly as possible to the Lone Star State to join the Cowboys. Unfortunately for the Lions their future building block of finally having two first-round all-pro caliber wide receivers that don’t suck on the field at the same time was now given yet another 1st round draft pick to waste on the next over-rated pass catcher who had some great NFL Combine times and wonderlic scores that prove he went to Remedial Three-Sided Geometry and Basic Basket Weaving class more then once a week.

Did Matt Millen sneak back into his office?

Adam Jones. Overhyped, can’t hold his liquor, and has a temper control that rivals my two year old that was just told she can’t stay up to watch the Dora the Explorer double feature on Nick Jr. At least Pacman still has his eyesight unlike this unfortunate nudie club patron that no longer has a reason to go back after losing sight in both eyes due to two separate fights over three months at the same club. Maybe he should have tipped Clarissssa a little more before getting her 8 inch heel in the ocular area after getting drunk off three Odouls and calling her flat chested?

Now, that takes talent and poses the question: is there a reason for him to return to that (or any) strip club? Perhaps just to smell the stripper perfume or the lunch buffet and 2 for 1 happy hour specials? May his mother will just bring home a warm six-pack of Schmidt and a pack of Reds from now on versus causing anymore trouble at her workplace.