Play Solid Poker

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Monday Ribeyes

Came home yesterday to smell of steaks on the grill as the wife explained she was feeling nice and decided instead of Easy Mac N' Cheese a full steak dinner with roasted potatoes, ribeyes soaked in wine (I added a little Famous Dave's Devil Spit which completely kicks ass), and grilled corn-on-the-cob.  Due to the nature of our schedule, Monday - Thursday is usually a throw something in the microwave and rush back out the door dinner.  The surprise is how my wife expresses that I done something right recently but since I have the game of Revenge of the Nerds stand-in, I'll just keep scanning the credit cards to see if I've purchased a Mexican cruise for two in September before passing out after reporting last weekend.

The first weekend of the post-Black Friday SCOOP tournament series and while the numbers are down, they are cracking the guarantees with good amount of players for every buy-in level.  The production got a step-up this year as they've added a daily recap show called Inside SCOOP with Joe Stapleton and Nick Weathall commanding the microphone with interviews from the winners via Skype as well as Team PokerStars pros and Team Online.  Even got to see a few hands I reported on as Alexander "josio" Kostritsyn went on a tear last weekend collecting a 2nd, 2nd, 2nd, and 3rd in the high buy-in tourneys.  But, after two days off I'll be back in the fray tonight through Sunday reporting for PokerStarsBlog and getting to know my couch for the next five days.

I get four weeks vacation each year and for the past three years I have used two of those weeks to work for WCOOP and SCOOP.  To tell you the truth, it feels more relaxing and fulfilling to indulge in job that I love to do but don't have the necessary equipment (bad hearing makes live reporting juuuuuuuuuust tad tough) outside of being behind a laptop to complete.  I'm not a journalist, nor a writer, just a card player with a love knack for throwing a few readable puns together.  When I write for these series know that I enjoy the action, and give a little OW! when a nasty river card hits at 4:30am despite having zero personal financial consequence.  Unlike accounting where you're supposed to leave your emotions at the door, I'm a little colorful when it comes to poker or poker reporting, call it releasing the inner-degen, something I cannot or should not do while sitting in cubicalandia behind Dilbert cartoons and an outdated computer.

I know the loss of online poker for Americans sucks and people within our little niche circle are good work for little consequence like Karak who penned a great post about seeing the issue of legalized internet poker from the eyes of the morally right.  Adding the disclaimer that he is Christian and is completely honest about the beliefs from powerful political groups like Focus on the Family.  CK and Grange of course continue to do the leg work of hammering out rough, massive mounds of rocky lawyer babble into malleable, clean, easy-to-read sheets of information for the masses.  2+2 continues to have too have too many forum tards that want to spend more time flinging poo at company reps (but some it admittedly is justified as a simple one sentence explanation for the delay would sedate many people) versus having solution discussions, but luckily you can tap Karak or KevMath to sift through the muck to find the good stuff (yes, it does exist). 

Online poker and poker in general will continue to be part of my life until pen is forced to be dropped, and even then I'd find a way to put together a few sentences about this card game whether it be in a professional capacity or screeching my bow across the strings here.  WPBT get togethers will still happen, likely a smaller crowd but if you enjoy those weekends of stepping outside your skin, fellow degens will available long after Harrah's.com becomes the official online card room of the 2015 WSOP.  Why?  Because everyone needs to step out of their monkey suit, briefcase, stethoscope, laptop, fortran code, parenting skin for just a few days to realize how good they have it to be in that skin eating a juicy steak during a busy Monday, starting another busy week.  I'll be there in December, tournament or not to see these people, even if MGM insists on charge $11 for Cap'n Coke because the cowboys don't know better, because you never know when you'll be wisked away in a limo with five other guys with grins that reached LA to G-Vegas after a concert that touched your soul. 

Something you won't find banging at a keyboard at home, here's to hoping I see ya'll soon (a WSOP trip 06/26-06/29 is starting to get my interest).

Where we talk about poker before writing about poker

Twitter went abuzz yesterday as US players who did not ask for the bank wire option payout from PokerStars got their checks.  Sure enough when I got home there was one sitting on the kitchen table underneath an ad from Aria and Harrah's.  WSOP time?  No, the check wasn't for that much but enough for a "free" ticket to Vegas and a decent hotel and since I still have a workable bankroll, the WSOP is a possiblity, more so if backers sprout up.

Should I stay or should I go? (if I go there will be trouble...  that much is certain)

Another shot at a WSOP tourney is food for thought, especially after the confidence boost from roaching my way to chopping up that O8 tourney at Binion's two years ago.  But, really I'd rather see my degenerate friends for a little school/work/kids/life stress relief and sling some chips.  Add on a nice extra paycheck from assisting with the SCOOP series that got off to a bang on Sunday with all three tourneys beating their guarantees.  Be sure to check out the recaps from your hard drinking working bloggers at PokerStarsBlog.  I'll be joining the team on this Thursday, working through the weekend, then starting up again on Tuesday afternoon through Sunday where some juggling in schedule between a fun run at Como Zoo that I forgot about will happen Saturday morning (those playing the high stakes PLO tourney that morning, please stretch your Euros a bit while I get some sunshine with the kids).  But, with the size of the fields thus far and the length of the tourneys there should be no problem trying to keep up with my daughter for a half mile and heading back to the reporting cave for some GAMBOOOOOOOOOOOOL! (6-max PLO is my favorite tourney to watch/report on).

Full Tilt unfortunately continues to have issues stemming from separating player/company funds as my meager bankroll there is still locked up and they can no longer sponsor that graphic you see on the right hand side of the blog.  But, it will remain there regardless.  They have supported us poker bloggers for too long to cut and run until the company itself asks for the ad to be taken down.  I sincerely hope things improve soon for my friends and a site that supported us throughout the years with freerolls and especially the Battle of the Blogger tournament series where my luck always seemed to be at its worst. 

UB/AP continues its fall into the abyss as they axed their US-based pros yesterday along with bankruptcy scares, raids in Costa Rica that spilled over to the wrong poker site, and unfortunately leaving a good friend who is one of the best in the business, out of a job.  He'll land on his Pittsburgh sports homer feet soon enough, but UB/AP deserves to die a quick death along with the millions they have stolen from poker players around the world.  Restructuring to capture non-US market players?  Minimal caps on cashouts (and not to mention a "check processing" fee)?  Why would any player with Party, Tilt, Stars available want to play on a site that has cheated its players (read all about the scandal with an upcoming book announced by uber-sleuth Haley Hintze yesterday), couldn't even figure out a decent RNG for a simple game like Keno, and saw its two biggest "stars" walk away at just the right time (strangely not a lot of talk about their seemingly innocent departure)...

Hmmm... indeed

Rambling man found dead in Abbottabad

So...  anything interesting going on in the last few weeks?

I'll remember my porch and Twitter locking my feeble laptop while trying to upload the May Day version of the Sunday Warm-up as Osama Bin Laden finally drew his last vile breath on Earth.  Looking up and seeing it was 9:30pm with only four players remaining and thinking about finally getting a decent night sleep to help battle this chest cold that has lingered for two weeks, but suddenly Twitter exploded with 100+ twits, twats, tits in a matter of a few minutes.  After armageddon was disproved and I put away the snide remarks to my wife about going out with a bang (h/t Chevy Chase and Aykroyd), I flipped over from the poker wrap to see that the world's number one terrorist would not be plotting any more.

This does not stop the religious abuse, the shoe bombs, the potential future 9/11-like attacks, in fact it may just piss off the lingering terrorist cells into doing something rash.  But, the head is severed from the body.  The thinking leader behind the reason you take off your shoes and get a free hand job before joining friends at McCarran airport for a weekend of Pai Gow, foie gras with unpronounceable flavorings, and ripping up $100 wagers on the 3am Tanzania/Turkey cricket tilt.

No more.

Oh, don't worry you'll still get your complimentary sexual healing from the TSA, but Bin Laden won't be laying out the blueprints any longer.  For the current time, intelligence agencies will seeing a fight or flight by the terrorist cells linked to Bin Laden.  Will they use this to paint an (un)holy martyr and rally around their fallen leader to enact something even more terrifying than the 9/11 attacks?  Or disperse into smaller acts of a car bomb here, suicide bombers there, slowly trying to gather enough steam for another massive attack?  Citizens like myself will have to rely on those whose names will never appear on a newspaper, faces that are unknown to any database, and hope those who crawl through the slime trails left by these holy pretenders find them before they find us hiding behind our Dodge Caravans.

There are no words that describe their sacrifice and I certainly couldn't write enough to properly thank them. No amount of money or materialistic items will ever be enough, but if you ever lucky enough to meet someone who has served this country without selfish thought, buy them a beer and thank them for allowing the biggest problem in your day is getting your daughter to eat her green beans or the ability to play online poker.

And to those who thought Obama was taking some kind of victory lap with that beautiful speech Sunday night?  Kindly place a large rusted spiked unlubricated object up your self righteous ass.  Obama did good, he did something right, save the bashing for when gas prices hit $5.00/gallon and ExxonMobile or BP comes out with another record breaking quarterly profit announcement...

Clean Slate

He can't see, he can't hear.

Uncoachable.

20(!!) years ago on a back field at Osseo High School, right next to the tin shack of a hockey arena that was reeciving a much needed face lift and second rink, there's a worn down baseball diamond.  The backstop is littered with uncut follage, the fence curls upward in places allowing passed balls to become free bases, the outfield is sparcely cut and has no fence allowing home runs to become very long doubles, and the pitching rubber slightly tilted upwards to remind the hurler to mind his delivery or be prepared to eat some gravel along with a chorus of heckling.

A tall, skinny sophomore who never played on the teams with button down jerseys, matching pants and stirups, or freshly polished shoes walked across the long stretch between the high school and this long forgotten place of play.  The benches were no more than a plank of warped wood on the open field, unsheltered from the errant foul tip.  But, Mr. Darby Carlson sat there waiting to begin choosing who would work their way from this blight to the concrete dugouts of the varsity field located right next to the gym exit.

"If it doesn't happen, I can hang up my glove for good"

Years of tears, disappointments, road trips, tubes of icy-hot all for a shot to make a school team which carried the weight of several recent state tournament appearances and players going off to play for college teams.  And here was the last chance as Darby had no thoughts of nepotism, no parental handshakes for their sons to walk on the team, no worries about pieces of plastic in my ears, a clean evaluation for the first time.

I wasn't the most gifted athlete, hell at best I was average.  But, good enough to wear a varsity letter my senior year because of honest coaches who saw that I had a talent of plunking batters throwing hard enough and working hard enough to pitch for this team three years prior.  A ray of hope that there are somethings you CAN work hard for and get paid off.

My naiveness of the current online poker situation is a mix of assuming too much and not knowing enough.  As I took the family last night to a local bar called J. Cousineau's, a long-time supporter of my days before responsibility, the cajun chicken sandwich and seasoned fries were unmarkable but decent bar food as the waiter certainly exceeded expectations and was very friendly and genuine. 

Surrounded by jerseys of Dino Ciccarelli, John Randle, and a flag from Bushwood Country Club signed by I'm assuming Carl Spackler right after his miraclous cinderella man shot, was a TV showing a different set of programming than the Yankees/White Sox tilt shown on the other ten sets.  TVG.com was playing as the 5th at Turf Paradise was calling the horses to the gate.  Listed below were the odds from the nine's 5/2 all the way up to the four horse's 85/1 (sired by Mr. Otis perhaps?).  OTBs are not legal in Minnesota, but holding a phone with internet capabilities for the first time, if I wanted to plunk a few dollars down on a horse that will likely fall before the announcer gets the word "OFF!" out of the microphone, I could.

Why could I wager here, but not on something with much better odds AND knowing I hold an edge?  If I'm faster, throw harder, work harder, why don't I get the spot on the team?  If I'm more knowledgable, better personality, have more drive to succeed why don't I get the job.

Naive.

World doesn't work that way dumbass. 

The difference between what should be and what is, is called life.  Deal with it, or get run over.  Finally after several years of tryout disappointments, the lanky kid who walked off that field with the tattered hand-me-downs of the varisty jersey package worn three years ago, including a turtleneck that was a better fit for the arctic circle, found a place on the sophomore team and finally realized what is, is, what didn't happen you can't control so after a good cry, its time to move on.

Finally the lesson sunk in after the favorite crossed the line and my kids were asking about a summer trip to Canterbury Park, and some friends with their heads on much straighter than my own via Twitter explained the gray parts of the online poker proceedings. 

The fight for online poker in the US isn't about who did what, or "freedoms", nor is it about what is right.  Its PR, its American Idol where phone-in votes count (some more than others), its about money and globs of it, high enough for Scrooge McDuck to make a second swimming pool vault.

It's about opportunity, selling the right idea to the right person at the right time.  Just like I managed to finally sneak onto the team from years of playing behind a wall of favorites, I managed to take advantage of the situation.  Will online poker advocates do the same?

April Snow Showers

In November when the first snow drops expectantly, resting gently on top the needles of the Nordic pines and bare branches of sturdy oaks, it's pretty.  Even a lifelong resident of this state will take sometime to prop two knees on the couch which overlooks a backyard in need of a landscaping manicure.  Watching the big flakes stack on top of each other, similar to being back in Mrs. Hughes' 1st grade class and outlining a tree in Elmer's glue then sprinkling glitter down the construction paper for an easy art project to put up on the fridge.

pic cred


However.

When the day on the 2011 Dilbert calendar claims it's one day after Passover, having to don winter coats and drive thru snow just might set off a rant about the weather.  A little bit. 

Much like the current online poker (in the US) collapse, it is better to take the stance of inevitability (but if you're like myself were hoping for the best outcome), read about those who can speak about the events with their awesome lawyerly knowledge (a gentleman with good taste in wine but bad taste in starting hand selections and the black widow herself), and make the best of a shitty situation.  The PPA has shown over the weekend of its misguided attempts and misunderstanding about what took place and how to react to it.  Thankfully within our little circle of poker media, bloggers, and players we're a pretty smart bunch.  I do not include myself, but those like Wicked Chops who took an excellent government messaging programs created by the PPA (they are good for something), and turned their OMG POKER IS NOT ILLEGAL!!?!?!!1111 message into a prose of understanding the big three potentially did something wrong and this should push those officials into doing something right by allowing the millions of players in the United States to play legally from their homes under a regulated and taxed platform.

And to those who think the government did not force the hand of these operators?  Five letters.  U.I.G.E.A.

To the hypocritical government that allows people to throw large amounts of money at Wall Street while day-trading, how exactly is that  different from betting on a 71% chance of fading six outs?  I know, old argument, same ol' rant, go collect your UPC label citizen.

To myself and my family this will hurt the elasticity of my bank account.  Less going out, less fun, and unfortunately, less seeing my dear friends scattered across this country.  While all is light and fluffy at the present time, it will be tough to see that things will run as they have in the past for much longer (although if it could last until I walking down the aisle with my accounting degree in hand next year that would be super-awesome).  Personally, I have no desire to pick up a second job other than the one I have currently.  I work for a friend who tends to make people reflect on things profoundly with each carefully crafted paragraph and descriptions that give the five senses a tingle, especially after hearing the porch floorboard creak exactly one step from the recliner on the west wall when getting home yesterday. On a working basis, there's no one I'd rather lose a little sleep for, especially for the fact that he took a leap of faith with this very green blogger and trusted him to come through over the past three years. That trust is worth more than he'll ever know regardless of how this bad situation shakes out.

Change is coming, eventually the snow will melt along I-94 and the pines lining my property line. The big three will have their day in court, and next week the family cabin/trailer will be opened for another season of deckside drinks while brushing off the grime of the suburban shuffle and other petty life worries.  I was told during my interview feedback session that my best quality was my tenacity and ability to adapt to change. 

Here's my chance to prove it.

Red Dawn Online Poker Style

Honey Badger vs. Wolverines who wins?

Sigh.

Last weekend was a blind-side tackle from a defender people knew was on the field but didn't know how hard or when he would hit.  If you want the meaty portions of the lawsuits with excellent commentary and legalese CK rocks it with a three parter check em out here:  Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

I'm sure the people who read here also have penned their tears of online poker in the US going poof and watching helplessly as our friends from places Not America are able to continue their hobbies, or in some cases, their living as a professional card player.

Me?  I was shocked by a text message as over the weekends I tend to stray from checking Twitter, poker sites, and blogs too much due to school and spending time with the kids.  Now armed with an old Blackberry to replace the phone I lost in Texas, I could check Pokerati and other sites while in line for the 2-liter pop bottle ring toss at the local school carnival (I won a bottle of Grape Crush if you must know).  And while my kids tried their luck on the lollipop tree hoping for a colored tipped stick good to trade-up for the little stuffed animal, my thoughts were on those most affected by the government's rash decision to blitz the "Big 3" with criminal charges.

Surly these companies had some sort of plan should the shakedown come down especially after Jon Kyl in his rabid anti-fun anti-logic brigade snuck the UIGEA into the books several years ago.  We can't stop two rich women from abusing the financial laws to the tunes of nine figure sums, making the already super-rich into being able to take over a decent sized country (h/t to Change100) but the US can crackdown down on people trying to have a little fun in the comforts of their own homes or a coffee shop, or even a few who are skilled enough to make a living from poker.  Even worse are the people who may lose their jobs as accountants, analysis, computer programmers, and something that closer to home, the poker writers.

Who exactly is hurt by online poker, where's the seedy back-alley drug exchange taking place?  Sadly I don't have the time to go into a long rant other than to say my government continues to adhere to policies that become the fight of the few who hold the power versus the word of the many.  This is still a democracy right?  Word of the people and all that?

No.  It's become something else.  A nation where two women can make more money then 99.999% of the world could dream of spending by twisting a few words and filling out the right forms, and a righteous team of feds can take away the hobby of millions and jobs of thousands because they couldn't get their flopped flush to hold (sorry had to use at least ONE poker pun).

I love my country, and much like a 4 year old who got send to bed early last night due to a bad attitude, I may be pouting right now but I hope with some sleep and dreams, things will be better in the morning.

Earning my yearly poker blog cred

With an added $325 from Full Tilt and PokerStars all thanks to the WPBT Luckbox last longer and added money by Poker From the Rail.  I hear some extremely talented writers drop by that site and write about poker, I think you should check out this post:  Aftermath of Winning for such an example of awesomeness.

Or lameness.

Because Al is downing hurricanes and stripper's g-strings while I'm hoping my car doesn't break down in the ass cold sub-human temps we are set to receive with zero lube for the next few days.  Actually the lube would turn into an icicle with painful results, so keep the Astroglide indoors for safe use with your 16 gear rabbit vibrator.

Many semi-busy bloggers *points at self* have the fancy graphic of PokerStars' World Blogger Championship of Online Poker blinking on their dusty online journals ready for the battle to see who's got game behind the swirl of horrible puns and barely readable metaphors.  Maybe a few of you can write, and some knock it out of the park with the funny (see:  Wolves by Hyperbole and a half and always tip your babysitter even they managed to not steal anything).

Pot Limit Omaha January 24     14:00 ET     Tournament ID 339187689 

No Limit Hold’em  January 25     19:00 ET    Tournament ID 339187690

PL Omaha H/L    January 26     22:00 ET    Tournament ID 339187691

No Limit Hold’em    January 27     14:00 ET    Tournament ID 339187692

8-Game Mix         January 28     17:00 ET    Tournament ID 339187695

No Limit Hold’em     January 29     15:00 ET    Tournament ID 339187696

There's your line up kids, fear not as I have zero chance of playing the first tourney because I am the lame and responsible type who will be pecking away at spreadsheets instead of winning a free trip to SCOOP.

It will be tempting to stay up for the Wednesday tourney of course because who needs sleep when a split game tourney is guaranteed to go at least 6 hours which is exactly when my alarm would ring my ass up for work. 

Using a page from the whining book

Whine and thou shalt receive. 

My kids employ these method on a daily basis and once in a great while through frustration I'll give in.  Softy, I know.  Mostly because the words "daddy is working" coming out of my mouth while doing homework or describing the seventh place finisher in the Sunday Warm-Up at PokerStars, has a ghastly charcoal taste to each syllable.  Last night it was creating invoices and receiving payments for a fictional landscaping company while my son wanted a second knight to accompany him in a game called Castle Crashers on the PS3.   For the low price of $14.99 (plus some PS3 add-on cost of a buck and change) these little square-headed knights bop different ghouls and wombats Street Fighter style with a little RPG thrown in as there's leveling, gold collection, and standard strength, magic, dex, and defense add-on to improve your character. For a quick game, well worth the purchase.

As I poured some tears out on these pages way too soon about floating cash at Full Tilt the joy seeing that cash with a bonus enough to cover more than the bank fees (thank you good sirs) was back in my account by the time Michael Vick was in the middle of going All-Madden on the Redskins last night (seriously, if the Eagles played like that, can anyone beat them?).  Now with two accounts flush with online moneys, the question is:  is it safe to try to withdraw again?  One method involves several fees adding up to $60 which doesn't appeal to me but for the sake of "bet more" in Vegas a few less lap dances won't hurt the silicone and baby powder crowd too much.  The other method is wait and pray that the check clears, and with three bad checks already in the past few years I don't need my bank getting itchy to close my account that has been open since Ronnie Regan ruled the White House and I was getting my 100 pound skinny ass kicked in middle school.

For those who still drop by and play, let me know if you've had experiences (good or bad) with cashing out, and I'm not talking about getting your aces cracked five times in row while your brand new 100" 3D-HDTV blows up in the background from the cash-out curse.  Save those stories for the Geisha Bar.

22 days shopping days till my birthday folks.  Get a move on.

PLO: I Fail To Suck again

Missed my son's baseball practice and was worried I was going to min-final table cash as I came into the last nine with the least amount of chippies.

Well...

We don't post pictures of min cashes here

Oberdonk had me at least four to one HUs holding just five big blinds. I took the extra $50 to chop it up and the small timer had another decent score under his belt. Sorry again for the dust rising in this space as my last week of school's first quarter ends and well, there's some work to do aside from the three jobs I've been juggling. And dropping the ball on my head this point would make those mornings of not being able to see straight all for naught.

Rawr.

June 1st = Internet Poker's Y2K?

If you worked in IT on December 31st, 1999 than term "Y2K" would probably set off a series of flashbacks of not watching your female friends flash their boobs after doing that 5th round of Irish car bombs at the New Year's party but instead sitting huddled around fellow geeks hoping your company's mainframes wouldn't suddenly go tits up and eat itself.

The world did not end, computer problems were minimal, and I was still eight months away from being a legally married man despite becoming a homeowner just two weeks prior.

Now that the Internet Poker version of Y2K has come to past, will the UIGEA's ugly "due date" has come and past but as of right now (7:30pm CST) PokerStars has 187,183 players on 29,660 tables and Full Tilt has 88,844 players on 27,304 which doesn't seem like everyone got the fuck out of dodge and are continuing to play.  For now, a sea of calm even at 2 + 2, whose official June 1st thread doesn't show a lot of panic, except for a popular credit card option being cut off.  I for one have never used a credit card to deposit so I wouldn't know about such things.

Still, I have a (large for me) paycheck coming to me in the next few days from SCOOP, and was hoping someone in the 2+2 thread would have chimed in about any problems with cashing out.  No worries.  I can still play in the WSOP this year if my heart desires such action unlike this douchecanoe who pulled something akin to trying to put a hand in the till of an open register at the 7-11 while the cashier tried to make you a Big Gulp.

I hope there was an angry mob of player waiting to give him a beat down for trying to steal another player's chips.

We Be Frolfing Yo

In times past a morning where I'm not hussling the kids towards the kitchen table for Fruity Pebbles and eggs, there would be online poker to be played. 

Instead I'll be enjoying some disc golf at Elm Creek today.  Yes, there's a fee and I'll find out if it's worth it.

The weather is too nice, and this whole getting-in-better-shape doesn't stop at the inclined bench press and glider machines.  No, there's only so many repeats of Sportscenter and yelling at the computer after some bad beat that's happened too many times to care.

Yes, I still enjoy the game.  Yes, I'm still a fanatic that loves the fact that I get to report on the game.  But, a balance must be there, instead of posting a "I'm burnt out" post every 6 months there's more important things to do.

Like hitting this monster 694 foot hole in under 10 shots:

See you at the tables tonight perhaps when the sun goes down so does my ass after having some fun outside today.

Weekend With Laptops

Trying to pull away from playing more poker yet with the Mastodon weekend in Greenville, SC and a trip to Vegas next month along with the below going ons at Full Tilt and PokerStars have me throwing my bankroll onto the virtual felts.

Full Tilt has FTOPS MCDLXVIII going on and after checking out the final table of the PLO event the sites flagship tournament series is running as strong as ever.  Yes, RUSH POKER (a.k.a. freebase virtual crank) is still giving me fits and excitement.  Even after six years of playing a game with the largest dollar amount swings, Rush Poker still has my head spinning from the peaks and valleys.  But, for a full-time worker, parent of two, and soon-to-be student (pending finanical aid and transcript review) it brings the condensed full session of 500-1000 hands in a matter of one or two hours depending if I throw in a second table or even a third with 6-max PLO. 

One other promo you may want to check out the Big Little Tournament with a 200K guarantee for just two bucks AND its a turbo meaning this guy can slide in the play before work at the PokerStarsBlog tonight SCORE!

At PokerStars the milestone race is on as the 40th Billion hand promo has a giveaway with every millionth hand getting a slice of money multiplied by according to how many VPPs you've earned.  The true grinder will be walking away with a hefty score after that.  Also there's a chance for the low roller to get some high stakes action as a $40 buy in will get you into a $1 million guarantee tournament at 1:30 CST this afternoon.

If you're the live playing sort then a trip north to Mille Lacs Grand Casino for the conclusion of the Minnesota State Poker Tour $1K Bracelet event today because I suck at life I am not attending today and will be huddled under a blanket and laptop instead of having fun with like-minded degenerates.

The Key to Enjoying the Super Bowl: Indifference

At first while watching the pre-game shows to the Super Bowl I was:

Then the commericials were somewhat-kinda-sorta funny, and the craft beers my buddy brought over made the game and the goal line stance by the Colts before halftime made me:

Enjoyable again. Decent mini concert by The Who, onside kick, untimely Manning fail, and more beer giving way to some bad attempts at television ad humor and allowing Shannon Sharpe to continue to butcher the English language worse than a lispy blogger and get paid six to seven figures for it. Oh wait, that's me but more like two figures here. And a few more chippy hits by the Saintly Saints reminding how close it was that the men in Purple could have been there, and... we're back to:

Bourbon Street probably was more hopping than Hennipin Avenue last night even if the people in this state had a rooting interest in the game.  Instead of a grandeur spread of Vikings fans coming out of the woodwork with a backyard bonfire and frat party alcohol spread we settled on indifference and enjoying the inside jokes that a group of friends have after being around each other 15+ years.  The cookies were good too, and no you can't have any because my cookie monster son wrapped in G.I. Joe jammies ate them all.  Jerk.

The weekend was a college search, a car repair search (damn you transmission JUST WORK), and some slightly profitable poker play at Full Tilt and PokerStars as with the winter months my play increases since the weather outside is more optimial for a Eskimo versus an office worker who is two shades of white from becoming translucent.  Rush Poker continues to draw me in as I've up to two tables:  one NLHE and one PLO 6-max in the search for a TomTom from the Full Tilt points store which was badly needed after trying to navigate Dinkytown on Saturday morning en route to my son's TC Marathon fun run at the U of M Fieldhouse.  There were tears and luckly a very bored criminal justice law student who took time away from tort research to draw a map for a hurried parent with two crabby kids and a wife ready to lose it in the car.

Might need to ramp up my play a bit.

And if you're one of two Minnesota poker folks reading these pages this morning, the MNPokerMag.com page has been redone AND there's a week long Minnesota Poker Tour series going on right now at Grand Casino Hinckley Mille Lacs with the $1K bracelet event this weekend.  If the weather calms down and the mini van's transmission cost does not exceed salvage worth, I'll be making a small trip up north on Saturday to check out the place where I made my first LEGAL casino wager over 17 years ago.

I think I just heard my knee pop again.  Old age sucks.

Online Poker Freerolls

There are several ways one can start an online poker bankroll from scratch and poker freerolls represent one of the most reasonable ways. If you feel that you have absolutely no money to spare on poker, you can still break into the real money online scene through poker freerolls. Freerolls are MTTs (Multi Table Tournaments) which do not require a real money buy-in (registration is basically free) but award real money prizes. Due to the nature of such tourneys, the prize-pools will usually be rather shallow (there are exceptions to that rule though) and even if you do finish in the money, you’re not likely to take down a significant amount, regardless of the number of participants.

Some poker freerolls are offered to actual real money players as a reward for something (signing up, reaching a set number of FPs etc), while others are completely free to enter, as players are not even required to have made a real money deposit beforehand. Most freerolls are only available to depositing players though.

As far as strategy is concerned, poker freerolls are one of a kind. Because they have no money riding on the affair, most players will adopt a radically different strategy approach to freerolls than to real money MTTs. In a word: they’ll take things much more lightly. Some of them go for the do or die move as soon as the first cards are dealt. They figure that this way they either double up early, which pretty much doubles their chances for making the money, or they’ll bust out, in which case they’ll probably save the time they might’ve spent playing and not making the money anyway.

Past a certain point though, poker freerolls play the same way real money MTTs do. Look for MTT strategy advice to whip your freerolling skills into shape.

In need of an extra pip

With a typical day starting around 4:30am and ending somewhere north of 10:30pm the time to write and/or indulge myself with a little online poker becomes non-existent. The summers are made for getting everything done and doing everything possible before the polar ice caps move back in for their extended stay in the front lawn.

Softball, T-ball, cabin, sprinklers, picnics, beach, working out, landscaping all part of the summer whirlwind that seems like Wyatt just got out of school last week. A note from last night, by the time me and the wife got home, kids in bed, laundry and assorted Transformers/GI Joe/Barbie princess bedroom set were put away Joe Nathan was sweating a deep liner out to Denard Span with 1 out in the 9th inning of the Twins game on FSN North around 9:30pm.

Welcome to life.

Hi, nice to be here.

Plus the things I love doing such as writing a few words on card games that don't end with "em'" have to lag a bit (I promise a post for the MNPokerMag.com website by the end of the week if the Strike aerobics class doesn't kill me tonight). With WCOOP on the horizion, sleep and sanity will have to take a back seat to enjoying this run as long as I can fool people into enjoying my typed letters and careless puns. Is it not cool to enjoy poker and or online poker anymore? Sure, the poker-centric surroundings of this particular blog have taken a turn into a more personal rant-filled space where I air out my marriage sheets, Viking blurbs, and parenting stress.

Cards are a hobby (and a well paying one), its how I grew up. Cards have been and always will be a part of life regardless of bankroll, writing assignments, or family size. From the days of 10 cent Pinochle at the cabin in Elk River, to my first live tournament at Canterbury (Stud-Hi, and yes I made the final table thank you very much), to celebrating my first "real" score on the forgotten Freemont Street Experience surrounded by friends via poker, to chronicling online rounders from across the globe bad beat and check-raise their way into six-figure scores in the Sunday Million and other tournaments, poker will always have a place here regardless of the UIGEA, and whatever "National Poker Week" did to get the government to overturn the legality of transferring buy-ins across the interwebs.

Don't worry, it just take one "Favre-ism" to get the subject changed, such as yesterday while I was impressing no one while buffing up for the Badblood-Drizz arm wrestling re-match sure to take place sometime in the next blogger gathering, my favorite needle-in-a-toenail land baron Favre was on TV quoting something along the line of "I really hate people who can't make up their minds" while on the set for a commerical.

(head explodes)

Really? If that's the case I suggest the next time Favre walks by a mirror he should do the right thing and give himself 4-iron to the face and dunk your balls in one of those ball washers while a raccoon takes a swat at them. Play or don't play its not that tough when you're going to get 8+ million to do so with a decent front-line, receivers that don't completely suck especially with the potential of Percy Harvin and an all-world defense to allow you time to cut the lawn in Mississippi before its time to go back out hand the ball off for the Purple Jesus or Chester Taylor.

Throw for 300+ yards, 5 picks, and 3 TDs and the local media will crown you the next local sports hero next to Touchdown Tommy Kramer minus the binge drinking and Tim Laudner who hit under .200 but any Twins fan worth his/her salt could come up with the name and fond memories.

Tomorrow is "the day" (until the next day of course) after that the Viking faithful will look towards the depleted egos of Rosencopter and T-Jack Attack to lead our team to a Wild Card road loss with a series of 12-3 games that even the most rabid Purple fan will keel over from boredom with a half eaten Johnsonville brat in his/her mouth before halftime.

You're the Inspiration

Since I currently own nothing more than a phone that struggles to receive text messages and routinely runs out of memory while taking pictures, this is a placeholder for the next five days. It will take in dial-a-shots however.

It's time to adventure to a city that contains more people than this state twice over and I hear there's even places within this city that willingly serve you beer.

To my friends on media row at the WSOP, stay strong.

Poker From the Rail
Dr. Pauly
Pokerati
Wicked Chops Poker
PokerNews.com
Pokerlistings.com
Poker Stars Blog
Ulimate Bet Blog/

Its hard hearing about the conditions there that looked to be improving from last years fun-fest to this year's suck-fest for the media at least. How about the players? Any word on improved seating, rules, happy endings table massages, less kangaroo meat in the beef, Jack Links Jerk-off contests?

That's 18 days to touch down at Mandalay Bay where I'll spend my first five to six hours writing up in my room for PokerStarsBlog (Turbo Takedown and Battle of the Planets promos), then the plan is to crack a smile into the thousand-yard stares of those hard-working bloggers at the Rio. Prehaps even sneak in a quick session at the PLO8 cash game if its running.

But, tomorrow's plan is to enjoy the Wisconsin countryside, eat some cheese curds, drink some decent beer, flick off every Packer fan in site, pick up a Brewers' fan, and head down to Chicago for face boners, poker, baseball, and enjoy friends that can only manage to meet once or twice a year (actually my liver and wallet is thankful for this).






Side note: 1Queens Up1 mentioned checks are flowing from FTP, any word on the PokerStars situation? I heard a bonus was offered to those who's checks were denied, but since that would kinda-sorta hinder my plans to hitting up a decent dinner or two in Vegas I'd need a little more info before transferring my paycheck out.

Good news getting ugly

Bad News for online players:

This one is slowly leaking out and semi-troubling (or moreso in the cases of those at the WSOP or like me the low-roller needing a few bucks for the next couple of week's activities)...

Payment processor problems at Full Tilt and PokerStars causing multiple checks to bounce. Including mine.


06/08/09
RETURN ITEM FEE AZ 090608

$7.00
06/08/09
RETURN ITEM CHARGE - PAPER AZ 090608

$400.00
06/05/09
DEPOSIT #XXXXXXX
$400.00

Yes, its only seven bucks, and yes Full Tilt has returned the funds to my account but this is the first bad check I've ever cashed in the 25 years I've had this account.

Not happy.

Understanding, yes because right now there's some zealot up in New York still batting at the ghost of the UIGEA (the wrong way since tangling up WITHDRAWLS is NOT LEGAL and not covered by the UIGEA). First found at Pokerati where they had a link to the PokerStars returned checks discussion at 2+2.

I hopped on 2+2 last night after softball to see if Full Tilt had a similar thread. And they did. Sure enough my small check above crashed and burned this morning, but I was unable to find if I could request a new check, and damn skiddish about doing so as I'd rather not get this account frozen three days before a road trip to Chicago and three weeks prior to WSOP madness.

If anyone has some insight as to the smoke clearing on withdrawing funds I'll sing praises of you with the force of Pavarotti knocking out an aria in front of the New York Philharmonic.


Good News for Viking Fans:


Chilly (not this one) but (this one) grows a backbone and gets The Brett a deadline!

Minnesota Vikings coach Brad Childress has imposed a deadline of this week for Brett Favre to decide whether he will be the team's quarterback for the upcoming season, according to two sources.

Favre, however, is apparently reluctant to commit to playing a 19th NFL season without first being more confident the arthroscopic surgery performed recently on his throwing shoulder has succeeded in eliminating all of the problems related to a torn biceps tendon. Dr. James Andrews performed the surgery.

It would seem reasonable that both Favre and the Vikings want to know his shoulder is healthy before reaching an agreement, and the team is virtually certain to insist on seeing the 39-year-old quarterback throw before any contract is signed. Minnesota has four organized team activity sessions this week, beginning Tuesday.

He's Not Worth 10 Cent Chew Spit

Sportscenter "Cold Hard Facts" this morning:

"Brett Favre not in Vikings mini-camp mean anything?"

Seriously? People get paid six figures to drum-up jello hitting sports journalism questions like that?

I'll take a wild stab and say it means he's not playing, doesn't plan on playing, and the Vikes do not want him to play. Favre can go on with a wedge of Kodiak Wintergreen in his cheek planting a row of snap peas while listening to Peter King twitter alerts.

"Tom Brady back-up plans"

Everyone in the Northeastern United States cries if the world most un-eligible bachelor's knee goes down like George Washington's tree and he ends up nailing a supermodel twice a night instead of once for physical therapy.

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Almost forgot to thanks StB's Brewers for funding part of the Chicago trip next month. Salut!

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WSOP mandatory reading list stolen from Al who was up late railing a certain low roller as he won a 90 man tourney, finished 2nd in a 45 man, final tabled a Razz MTT, and finished 93 out of 2,000+ in the Midnight Madness this morning.



I rule!

Blog reading during the WSoP:
Poker From the Rail
Dr. Pauly
Pokerati
Wicked Chops Poker
PokerNews.com
Pokerlistings.com
Poker Stars Blog
Ulimate Bet Blog

For Twitter-rific folks on the suggestion of Pauly, Annie Duke's feed is damn funny.

Quick Hits Friday Edition

A couple of quick hits as my weekend of perpetual motion will begin with my wife beating my ass on the raquetball court this afternoon.

I suck. Damn those blue balls!

Pokerlistings with their awesome WSOP coverage last year is going to be filling a seat at a prelim event with the fine posterior of one of us lowly poker bloggers!

The Run Good Challenge is back! Unfortunately for me, it begins tomorrow which I've filled with a half-mile Kiddy Run for Wyatt and Kyra at the Como Zoo, then a funeral for my wife's grandfather (met the man twice in eleven years), and finally off to a softball tournament where my work team seems more like a bunch of ringers playing in a lower division. They've won their first three games with a cummulative score of 85-31. The teams they've beat? All at 2-1.

Ouch. Playing the "lower half" of the talent pool might require a pre-game six-pack to make it competitive.

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For your daily dose of Favre-gasm... Brett goes to the doctor to get his arm checked. Any chance I could slide Dr. Anderews a fiver to snip where he should have stitched?


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Volunteered at Wyatt's school today for their "Super Kids Day" (think Track and Field day). Had a smile on my face the entire time. My booth had three sixth grade helpers for the sockball throw.

The object was to toss three yarn-balls (colored yellow and red, personally I would have went with periwinkle and mauve) at a plank of wood holding up used milk cartons and knock them down. Sure, there was a couple of mouth breathers that will end up trying to avoid police using Heeleys while stealing a 99 cent Slim Jim from Kenny's Market, that tried to ruin the fun. But for the most point the kids loved it especially trying to watch the balls being thrown back to the tallest guy on the field in the Twins shirt and catching/holding all six.

If I ever had to wonder what keeps a teacher in those positions? I'd say its the students who show up to learn, to play, to move forward, to better themselves even if their limitations keep them earning less than straight As.