Do you blame Zinedine Zidane now? Frankly I’m surprised he didn’t go for a 50 yard punt to the nuts or a Chuck Norris roundhouse to the head.
Ok, I’ve spend the first five minutes deleting and re-deleting this which I very rarely do because it concerns someone who I love very much. I don’t know how to express my puzzlement over her seemingly lack of affection sometimes. I’m somewhat hyper-aware of things, probably the reason why I can play multiple tables of multiple types of poker at once. Unfortunately, I’m stuck with over-analyzing something to death and finding out in due time that I really had nothing to worry about. I know it’s been a huge downfall of my relationships in the past (and the reason why I’ve lost more then one girlfriend) and something I try to work on almost daily.
So, how does one “get over it”? How do you block the conspiracy theories getting backed up into your head? I guess it’s a good reason why I have this page; to pour out this clutter that backs up before I hate myself for what comes out of my mouth. Believe me, there have been some hurtful things I’ve wanted to say but kept them in on the fact that when I thought it over some more it would do more harm then good.
She shows her affection in a different way then what I have implanted in my Homer Simpson-like melon. In the past, I haven’t given credit to those things because they were not what I was looking for. But, I fear that we’ll become one of those married couples who waited until their kids grew up to finally let out 18-20 years of bundled emotion ending with me buying a corvette and driving with a blonde stripper named Chloe to Vegas and living out the life of a has-been alcoholic degenerate gambler before succumbing to my girlfriend’s coke addiction and getting shot by her dealer/pimp.
Before I meet the business end of a 9mm, I hope that we can come to an understanding of each other and be the person that we looked upon at the altar over six years ago. Marriage is a constant work in progress and that’s something I didn’t give into consideration when I signed off on the certificate in Ramsey, Minnesota. I was blinded by the fact of WHOO WHOO FREE SEX!!!!!
Now, the marriage is much different, its more about getting to really know each other (yes, even after nearly ten years of this realationship), its about knowing our kids, its about relying on the other when you’re down.
And she’s helped me back up from nothing.
I’m not sure why I’ve just sat down and wrote things that most people read and say DUH! It’s my totally gay online diary, and today I felt like writing down crap about a woman that I care about very much and would like to have her stick around for the next 50 or so years. Maybe tomorrow I’ll draft something up about the profound meaning of a female retail cashier’s attire under her company issued smock or how to play AAXX out of position in a loose PLO game.
Today was for the wife, and hopes that I’ll get scowled at for not putting the dishes away when I’m old enough to check-raise the newest internet champion with my pants pulled up to my armpits while looking through my coke bottle glasses.
Thanks for dropping by, now has anyone qualifed for the Monster promotion at PartyPoker? I received an email stating I got a freeroll into their weekly tourney for being at a table of the same limit when someone hit the BBJ. When are the freerolls, and if you’ve qualified… is it worth your time?